Category: Donor Conceived
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At 35 I found out.

My mom disclosed to me at age 35 my sister was donor conceived. Three years later a separate donor contributed to my birth. I never felt close with my dad. I knew we were beyond different. I didn’t have the same characteristics as him. Emotionally, verbally, looks, interests. We never really were close as I grew up. He never taught me how to be a man. Never talked about his past. Never discussed girls. Nothing. I grew up just trial and error. I never felt close to my sister. I always said to my mom, ‘She didn’t like me. We…

Alone

I was conceived using both donor egg and donor sperm. I was raised be a single mother desperate for children. Honestly I can’t understand her choice. She decided to “make” kids that were not her own just so she could have the experience of pregnancy instead of adopting a child that desperately needed a home and would have the same genetic connections to her – none. I feel so alone, the only person I know I am related to is my twin sister, and even we look nothing alike. People don’t even believe we’re twins, they just think that we…

PLEASE, Just adopt a child in need

Prospective adults of sperm/egg donation, please listen. I’m a DC child and growing up without knowing my father has destroyed me. It has given me depression, anxiety, abandonment issues, “daddy issues” and just every day sadness. I personally think that Anonymous sperm and egg “donation” should be illegal. I know you want that perfect little baby who is biologically yours, but that baby is also 50% some stranger that you and they will never ever get to meet. They will resent you for signing away their rights to meet their father/mother. Adopting a child is so much better for everyone….

Unknown

Hello my name is Liv, I’m from Argentina and was born thanks to an in vitro. Ever since I was little I was told that I wanted to know the identity of the sperm donor, but as my mother could be considered one of the pioneers of such technique is a task quite difficult to achieve. I don’t know if it’s because I don’t have a father that I want to know the identity of simply because I feel that it feels quite strange walking around the city wondering which of the men who are around me could be my…

Dear “WHY DO I FEEL SO GUILTY?”

I feel the exact same way. I’m also a donor conceived daughter of a single mom and it pains me to know how selfish her decision was in having me. My mom was 42, never dated and needed someone in her life. By removing my father legally (with out even giving me the chance) she has sole custody and control over my life. It’s not right I agree with you. I’d love to talk to you more.

Who ARE you?

I’m a donor conceived child, the daughter of a lesbian couple who decided they wanted a child together 26ish years ago. My parents told me about the basics of my conception as soon as I was old enough to understand enough to wonder why I didn’t have a dad, unlike most of my friends. I had a happy normal(ish) childhood. It probably helped that I look a lot like my mom, so I never had that daily reminder that looking different would bring. I was lucky. I always knew I was loved and wanted, and I don’t think my parents…

I Never Knew I Was a Donor Baby

I didn’t think twice about providing AncestryDNA with a saliva sample. My husband, Brett, was curious to learn more about his cultural background, and I figured why not? It would be interesting to see the percentage breakdown of my parent’s genetic contribution to me – Polish, Italian, and Irish, and maybe even based on our findings plan a trip to the location that yielded the most confidence. So, when we received our DNA package, we both spit generously in the given vials and sent the package immediately in the mail eagerly awaiting our results. The results came to us on…

What Keeps Me Up at Night

For as long as I can remember, I’ve known that I am donor conceived. I was raised by an incredible single mom with a little brother from the same donor. There was no lack of love in my life. When I was a kid, I used to imagine that my dad was a superhero. I made up stories that he was a soldier fighting to protect me, that he was an MLB player on my hometown team who I’d watch hit home runs and trot around the bases triumphantly, that he was an ice cream man, or a firefighter, or…

Always knew I didn’t belong

At 25 I became ill and ended up in the hospital. During the course of tests it was accidentally revealed to me by a nurse that my father was not my biological father. After both of my parents repeatedly denying it for months my father finally admitted he wasn’t my dad but any more info would have to come from my mom. He wasn’t willing to give any details due to fear of angering my mother. About 10 years later she finally acknowledges that he’s not my “sperm donor but is my dad and will always be”. She claims to…

Why Do I Feel so Guilty?

Sometimes I forget that my idea of the word “family” isn’t the same as my peers, other days it’s all I can think about. I was made using an anonymous sperm donor, my mom had been single for a long time and was feeling lonely I guess. She always tries to joke it off, like saying “aren’t you glad I didn’t just hook up with some douche at a bar”, but I feel like this is her way of overriding my opinion on the subject, because after that how can I argue with her? I mean, she’s right, I’m glad…

Discovered on my own at 35 dad is not really dad

Nobody ever told me and nobody ever was going to tell me. The truth had been so well hidden that perception had become reality and for all intents and purposes my brother and I’s dad–was our dad. And this was something that was never questioned and never was going to be questioned. In fact, even the idea of questioning whether your dad is really your dad is just not something most kids ever even think of. So why at 35 years old (last summer 2017) did I decide to suddenly, out of the blue, decide to ask my mom such…

Biology Matters

I am so angry with the hypocrisy of the donors and the mothers. Women choose to conceive via donor sperm because they LONG FOR biological connection with their children. But then we, donor conceived children are expected to pretend that we don’t have a similar DEEP NEED for biological connection with our fathers. I love my mother (even though I am angry) but I still need to know my father. And my grandparents and cousins and siblings and, and, and. I feel hollow with not-knowing. I’m also angry with the donors who say biology doesn’t matter. They spread their DNA…