I want to have happy kids.

Submitted on: February 25, 2019

Im 42 years old now, Im single, I got no partner… Since I was younger kids always come close to me even tho they dont know me, apparently they feel comfortable with my presence, I have plenty of nieces and nephews who loves me. I wanted to have my kids when I knew I was ready to give them a financial stability, but I have just been diagnosed with Premature menopause and Cant have kids by my own, I always thought of removing myself from this world if I could not have kids, and now Im facing my worst fear…Im fighting so hard against going into depression.. But the only option the Doctors are giving me is by Egg and Sperm donors. I have talked to a couple of people I know that dont have kids to see if they want to co-parent with me and my babies at least have a parent around, but everybody thinks its a huge responsibility. So, I keep walking empty handed, I ended up here, cuz I want my kids to be happy, I want to give them all my love and all I build to offer them. But im also concern about their mental health, I already worried about my babies even when im just starting to consider this option. I know having donor eggs babies looks like a selfish situation, but its far away from that, how can loving someone be selfish? how can wanting to give someone all I have be selfish or have someone to give my life to be selfish? how putting myself at risk to have a baby be selfish? Do you guys think is an easy decision? Well its not..! Its a lot of stress, a lot of thinking, a lot of worries, a lot of pain to know I cant have kids, On top of the huge amount of $ Doctors make us spent to bring you out healthy, I know you would like to have your Biological parents, we all wish things didn’t have to be this way… but we still give you birth, you get fed and grow from our bodies, you carry the genes from your donors, but the rest of your existence, comes from ur mom (us)… We feel pain too…Have you ever stop to think what your parents had to go through or what they have to go through while you are growing and while you adults? Do you guys ever considered that you were brought to this world to be love endlessly, to be cared, how hard is to love your parents back? Im sorry if my words sound harsh… but not having kids is also painful, and so im looking to know if there Is any of you happy of having the parents you have, is there anyone here who can tell me how do I make my baby happy being a donor egg baby. Cuz I want my baby to understand what Im going through now, so he/she can understand why he/she was born. Please, I would like to read some good stories of egg donor babies that actually love their parents and actually understand what this journey is really like.