A letter to Damaged
I read your story with tears in my eyes. I too am donor conceived though my story is very different to yours. I found out that I was donor conceived completely by accident in my 50’s. My parents had every intention of taking the secret of my origins to their graves. Finding out shattered me: my identity felt instantaneously destroyed and I no longer knew who I was at all. I felt at various times (and sometimes all at once): the most intense anger, incredible despair, the most awful loneliness, betrayed, loss, alienated, howling grief, complete distrust in everyone and everything. It was the most horrendous period of my life. Every one of us is different of course: but so many of the emotions and feelings that you express are really, really common. Normal for a donor conceived person you might say.
What helped me?
The donor conceived community.
There is an online community of us out there you know, where we are able to express how we feel and support one another. We get it. We understand. The most wonderfully supportive friendships arise. You aren’t alone. Please take a look at the resources, support and help available to you by initially looking at sites such as https://www.wearedonorconceived.com which will give you links to other resources and groups that you can link in to…. and feel less alone. With lots of empathy, love and a huge hug from one donor conceived person to another….