First time Polynesian Donor “Mother”

Submitted on: May 27, 2019

Aloha Kakau,
So This is my first time experience doing this but at this point I am ashamed to admit it but I hit a financial struggle in my life right now and while i do want children it is not possible for me to do so right now because of the financial reason and i haven’t found a “perfect mate”, I had my first ever ultrasound done yesterday (to which i was very nervous about because i am “pure”). The ultrasound was a painful experience but i am still going to pursue the donation progress. My only concern though is right now i am stuck on whether or not i should keep the donation open or closed. Here are the two scenerios i came across:
Open donation: child will resent me for “not wanting them” or “not thinking about them” and “only doing this for greedy reasons”
closed donation: Child will not learn of their polynesian culture/language that I possess but the father lacks (as a polynesian, i think its important to pass down my polynesian culture some way). While i do understand that the child will not be my child persay, i still feel responsible of providing some important characteristics to the child. My Ohana (family) is supportive of my decisions of doing this and seemed relieved when i was leaning more towards the open donation but still debating on it. At this point i am thinking that this could be seen as “Hanai” in my polynesian culture and therefore acceptable to do so since that is the only way this makes sense to me.
So to any egg donor mother or “artificial” child out there, do you think i should keep it open or closed donation?